LOVE IS A CHOICE, NOT A COMMITMENT. Each day we have the choice to show up in our marriage, to be courageous and choose to love with honesty, integrity, and empathy. Just like everything in life the moment you understand and accept that no one can make you fall in and out love, just like no one can make you be healthy or unhealthy; the power is yours to create the type of love you want to thrive in.
The one thing that has held us together was our honest and open communication. We're still learning what that looks like from time to time, but the more and more we practice opening up to one another about our fears, concerns, hopes, and dreams the easier it becomes. Sometimes I wonder if I had been more open about some of the issues I was facing with other friends who were married than maybe we could've saved ourselves a few nights of going to bed in separate rooms furiously angry at one another. Last year when my husband and I were going through some rough patches I was actually open about it to women and a few men around me. I can't tell you how much hearing from other people who would just say, "GIRL, we've been there too..." helped. It was as if the feeling of loneliness, shame, and lack of self worth had subsided. It's crazy how when you get married, you somehow feel like you're supposed to be some love expert, when the reality is you've just opened up a whole new chapter of messiness to sort through with your "till death do us part" partner.